A Revelation
January 07, 2020So I had a revelation today in the car, driving through KL traffic. Was pretty explosive.
Here it is:
People don't give a fk.
They don't. I'm sorry, but they really don't.
Okay, you may be thinking, look, anyone who drives through KL traffic would think that, you're just mad right now, calm down.
That's a fair point, but legit though. People don't care, namely about you. Or me. Or anyone else.
It's not because you're a loser. Not because you're unimpressive.
People don't really care about you because they're too busy caring about themselves. They're busy caring about themselves (usually for the wrong reasons) because they think people care about them.
But they really don't. It's a vicious cycle.
Don't get me wrong, I don't mean this in a way that's like "PEOPLE DON'T CARE ABOUT EACH OTHER, PEOPLE HAVE NO COMPASSION" - what I mean is, you're not the centre of attention for people. I mean it in an impersonal way.
When people go "Hey, have you gained weight?" or "Why haven't you found a job yet?" (i.e. in untechnical terms - blame) or on the other end of the spectrum, "Your skin's looking better" or "It's so cool that you rock climb" (i.e. praise), they haven't cared about your weight, your job, your skin or your hobby this whole time, contemplating it in their free time between the last time they saw you and the present encounter, waiting eagerly for an opportunity to tell you, like a concerned parent or whatever.
They're only giving a fk now, because you're in view. Because it's convenient.
They've decided it's their business, just for this moment, this interaction.
In other words, they don't really, profoundly care about these things.
I don't mean for this to be an encouragement to hate the human race and swear off social interaction, or anything like that.
It's actually meant to be a positive thing. In realising this, there's actually a lot of freedom.
People don't really care what you do, so stuff it all. Tune in and do what feels right to you.
Don't be held back by insignificant, fleeting, conditioned perceptions, views and opinions.
What you think people think of you is just a perception about a perception that isn't even yours. It's not even real. Because people don't really know you, and they don't care enough anyway.
So go right ahead and live the life you want.
(N.B. Of course there are those that do care, and who matter - people who wish for your well-being and freedom from suffering. True friends. So I guess if there's anyone's opinion to be concerned about, it's theirs.)
(Semi) rant over!
Loveeee
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